Definitely blurry, IMRHO. Few people fit exactly and neatly into the categories "straight" or "gay". There are too many gradations of subculture and fetish.

Kinsey developed a scale to measure sexual orientation in men; I'm not sure there's an official scale for women, but you could easily use the same ideas.

http://allies.tamu.edu/Did%20You%20Know/kinsey.htm

so you're saying that straight and gay people should only be allowed to do certain things, so no one confuses their sexuality? It should always be well-defined?
I shouldn't be allowed to wear a pink shirt, because I'm straight. Right?

In the case of a restaurant manager, is his sexuality really an issue? He could be gay, or just really effeminate. Or maybe he just likes to portray a gay image to make his female customers comfortable. I've done that before. Regardless, its not really an issue at all.

Sorry, I'll stop raining on your gay parade.

Interesting. I hadn't thought about that angle. On the one hand you could say that if he's deliberately acting gay, then he can't blame girls for reacting to him socially like he's gay, even if he's not.

On the other hand, if you're not sure whether he's gay or not, maybe it's your responsibility to err on the side of caution, and not take the chance that he might take your messing around seriously.

On the gripping hand, how much trouble will it cause if you deeply offend/upset this guy? If there's likely to be significant repercussions (like, say, being permanently unwelcome at Village Inn), it's worth being careful in any case.

I want free pie. We've fought enough for it. It's hard work, we deserve the reward!

Yay! It's at Holiday Inn or something right?